Cultural collisions
The other day I was in one of the library branches. I was being assisted by a staff member while I used a PC in a bank of computers to log on to the new audio book system available for downloads from the website. Next to me were seated two children, a boy maybe 10 and a girl maybe 8. They were viewing music videos that had very suggestive images of women in various states of undress in shall we say not very modest poses (understatement here).
“Excuse me, but does your mom or dad know what you are watching?” I said, leaning over to the boy. He pointed to a young woman seated on the other side of him. I immediately apologized to her but could not resist pointing out that such videos could not be healthy for her children, especially her son.
Perturbed at my intrusion, the mom said, “They watch that all the time; there is nothing wrong with it.” During this exchange the library staff person was shooting me a look as if to say, “You are wasting your time.” The mom tried to make a hasty getaway but she had to pull her son away. His eyes had been glued to the screen. I could not help but think of what that young boy was being exposed to. Perhaps I did not accomplish anything but I had to say something.
Several years ago I attended a conference in which definitive evidence was given for the effect of exposing children to sexually suggestive material. The research showed that the one common factor of juvenile delinquency, especially among males was this early exposure that awakens in them feelings they are not mature enough to handle. Hence they act out, often ending up getting in a lot of trouble.
It is almost impossible to avoid all exposure to those kinds of images. Mothers and dads would be wise to explain to coming-of-age sons the concept of making a covenant with your eyes. My boys deliberately avert their eyes when passing certain stores in the mall. I try to avoid taking my teen boys to the mall, period, mostly for this reason. Still, I was rather brutally reminded in the library that day that the world we are sending our children out into is a world where many young people have become hardened to images which should shock, but no longer do. Our children will probably be attending classes in college and most likely will be working alongside other young people who have perverted ideas of truth, goodness and beauty. What is a mom or dad to do? How can we battle the forces of the culture? How can we prepare our children to impact the world around them for good?
We may be tempted to want to keep our children in a protective bubble. Of course when our children are young, we need to protect them as much as we can from a world in which children grow up way too fast. As our children are growing up, we need to prayerfully consider how to and when to talk to our children about some of the ways our culture has twisted God’s order of things.
Of course we are instilling in our children biblical values as we teach them. Hopefully, we are having regular Bible study times as a family as well. We all know the importance of just talking with our children, making God’s truth relevant to daily situations. Most importantly we need to pray for our children that God would protect them. One of the most encouraging thoughts to me is the knowledge that even though so many children are being exposed to so much and even though they may not be exposed to God’s truth, that does not limit God.
Our gracious heavenly father is strong enough to save even those mired in unholy lives as children. The Savior who was born in a stable is one who brings God’s light in the midst of darkness. Cultural collisions Continued from Page 4
I don’t know about you, but I am so looking forward to taking a Christmas break. When you have students in outside classes as well as classes at home, their breaks almost never coincide and it seems as if the homeschool mom never gets a rest. I am planning on starting some new things with my children after the break while stopping some other things. That is one of the advantages of home education.
Unlike school systems, which sink small fortunes into programs that may turn out to be duds, we are not locked into the decisions we make at the beginning of the school year. We may have spent some money in curriculum we do not like or that does not work for a particular child and that is perfectly OK. We do not need to beat ourselves up about that. Perhaps we can use it for another child down the road. At the very least we can resell it and recoup some of our cost.
I encourage you to evaluate what you are doing in your lessons. Do not be afraid to admit that something is not working or not well suited to a particular child. I am not talking about that child who just does not like math and is telling you that you MUST find that perfect curriculum that will cause him to get up everyday looking forward to more sums. What I am saying is that you know when something is not working.
You know when you and your child daily dread a particular lesson or curriculum. After more than 10 years of home education, I still believe that my children and I should mostly enjoy our lessons. My older ones are now largely on their own, but my two younger ones do all their lessons with me. I want to look forward to each new day of lessons knowing that I am helping to spread out a veritable feast of knowledge and ideas.
Note that we did not collect loads of activities to suggest in this issue of Esprit. On one hand, we ran out of space. On the other hand, we figured you had plenty to keep you busy over the Christmas season. Not that we need to be busy. I am longing for the days when my children and I have nothing to do but sit by the fire and read. I again have made a resolution to read one Christmas story aloud to my youngest each evening between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I pray you will find your own way to create memories with those you love. May your holidays be full of the joy and wonder of God’s incomprehensible love in sending us a Savior.
—JMT